Choose Your Own Christmas Debacle 2008
by Papergirl
Summary: The title says it all. Written for the Psychfic advent calendar.
1. Chapter 1

Merry Christmas and Happy Psych Advent Calendar!

First of all, I don't own any of the characters and mean no infringement. Just having some fun.

Secondly, I don't know how many of you have ever read the Choose Your Own Adventure stories, but I used to love them as a kid. I've always been a goodie-two-shoes, but I would always try to take the most dangerous path to try to get killed. Chase the smuggles into Pirates' Cove? Hell YES!

In that vein, you will soon be reading a multiple-stories story. When you get to the bottom of a chapter, you'll have some choices to make. Your choices affect the story you're reading (and sometimes, yes, may ultimately result in your untimely demise). Have fun!

Also, in true Choose Your Own Adventure-style, it's in second person (you're Shawn, btw) and present tense.

It took far longer than I was expecting to plan this out.

Enjoy!!

* * *

It's Christmas Eve and you're putting the finishing touches on your present for one Carlton Lassiter. Sticking down the bow with a flourish, you take a step back to admire your handiwork.

"He's going to hate it," Gus warns.

You wave a hand dismissively at your best friend. "Don't ruin the Christmas spirit, Gus. Lassie Claus is going to love it."

"Are we talking about the same Lassiter? About this tall," Gus motions with his hand. "Perpetually grumpy? Carries a loaded gun?"

You all but ignore him. Instead, you smile proudly at your work and give the bow a pat.

Gus spies Lassiter out of the corner of his eye.

"I'm out of here," he announces. "Enjoy your funeral."

"Wuss!" you yell as Gus runs away.

Still at a distance, Lassiter's long strides bring him closer. His eyes grow large.

"Spencer!" he barks. "What the hell did you do?"

You smile beatifically and explain.

What did you get Lassiter?

A) If you wrapped his car as a present, go to chapter 2

B) If you decorated his lawn with inflatable snow globes, go to chapter 3

C) If you got him the stray cat you took in, go to chapter 4


	2. Chapter 2

"What do you get the man who doesn't want anything?" You gesture to Lassiter's car, which is wrapped like a present. Completely covered in brown paper, big red ribbons stretch down the front and across the sides, culminating in a giant bow above the driver's door. You strategically cut the paper to leave the windshield showing - not so much out of consideration but so you could scrawl, "To Lassie, H & Ks, Shawn" in paint across it.

Lassiter runs the last few feet to his precious car, surveying the yuletide damage with disbelieving eyes. He reaches out a fingernail to scratch at the paint on the windshield.

"This better be washable." he growls.

"I think I grabbed the right kind," you muse innocently, scratching your head.. "The store was so hectic and the signs were so confusing..."

Lassiter's eyes narrow, his hand unconsciously - or perhaps consciously - drifting towards his holster.

Just as you start wondering if Lassiter really would shoot you point-blank in the SBPD parking lot - and on Christmas Eve, no less - your savior appears.

"Cute car, Carlton," Juliet says cheerfully, a merry twinkle in her eyes.

Lassiter glares daggers but Juliet's mood cannot be touched. He tears at the bow with such ferocity that you step back. Maybe your gift wasn't such a good idea.

Juliet continues to her car, and you jog to catch up with her.

"Merry Christmas, Jules," you say sweetly.

"Merry Christmas, Shawn," she smiles, looking over her shoulder at her partner. He is now hacking at the ribbons. "I think maybe next year you should just go with a gift card."

You've both reached her car.

"But that takes all the fun out of it," you explain. "Anyway, Jules, I know it's Christmas Eve and you have plans, but Gus bailed on me and I need a ride home."

Jules hesitates.

"If you drive me, I can give you your present."

She glances at the keys in her hand, still not quite convinced.

"What if I tell you your present is super nice?" you add.

"Fine."

"Woo hoo!"

"But I'm only doing this because it's on my way. And you can come only if you sit patiently in the car while I run an errand."

"Beggars can't be choosers, Jules," you say as you both slide into the car. "What kind of errand do you have to run?"

"Nothing big. I just have to..."

What does Juliet have to do?

A) If she has to buy egg nog at the grocery store, go to chapter 5 B) If she has to deposit a check before the bank closes, go to chapter 6 C) If you don't care because she's wasting your time, and you never should have gotten in the car in the first place, go to chapter 7 


	3. Chapter 3

"The spirits told me you threw out all your snow globes from last year, so I bought you these," you gesture to the dozen large, inflatable snow globes dotting Lassiter's front lawn. "Aren't they cute?"

Lassiter smiles thinly, humorlessly. "Were they expensive?" he asks.

"Yeah. I got them in bulk at Costco, of course, but they're not cheap. See, Lassie? I do care."

Lassiter gets his gun out of his holster. Your eyes go wide.

"Whoa, Big Boy," you say, backing up with your hands raised high. "They're just snowglobes."

"They're inflatable," Lassiter explains, taking aim at one.

"Lassiter! You can't shoot a snow globe!"

"You can't decorate a man's lawn without his consent," Lassiter snaps, reluctantly thinking better of his plan and holstering his weapon.

"What, is that against the law now?"

"Yes, Spencer. It's called Trespassing."

"Ah, but you can't prove I was ever here!" you tease, jogging backwards towards the street. You turn to face the right way but, in the process, you fail to notice the slightly-raised spike from one of the globes. A spike you thought you'd hammered in all the way.

You trip and, flailing, launch yourself into the street, where you are promptly run over by a reindeer.

If you wouldn't have hit your head and blacked out, you would have realized that it wasn't a reindeer, but Juliet's car decked out as Rudolph. The antlers, up above each window, escape unharmed, but the red nose on her grill isn't as fortunate, though it does stay plenty red.  
Juliet's in shock, but Lassiter acts quickly.

a) If he starts CPR, go to chapter 12 b) If he calls 911, go to chapter 13 c) If he checks for witness and quickly moves your unconscious, bleeding body to the back yard, go to chapter 14 


	4. Chapter 4

Well, my landlord is making me get rid of him. What with the fleas and all, but how could I just kick that adorable face out on the street?" you reach into the box on Lassiter's desk and remove the stray boy cat who mews and scratches in protest. "Careful, Lassie, he's still got his claws."

Lassiter's face turns a special shade of purple and really, isn't that what Christmas is all about?

"Spencer," he growls, his voice dropping to a register you hadn't known human voices could reach.

The tone in his voice attracts Juliet's attention. She has a cup of coffee in her hands as she returns to her desk.

"What'd you do, Shawn?" she asks, her voice gravely matching her face. Is she, dear God, she's actually siding with Lassie!

The cat is still clawing at you. He grabs hold of your holiday sweater and you try delicately to remove the paw without harming yourself, the cat, or the sweater.

"I couldn't take the little boy cat to the shelter. They'll kill him! Look in these eyes and try to condemn this cat to death."

With an annoyed grunt, Lassie knocks the empty box to the ground.

"Come on, Lassie," you say, just a hint of a whine in your words. "I know horses are more your thing, but give him a chance. Look at him and tell him you're going to kill him," you hold the no-longer-attached cat out. "If you can do that, I'll take him to the shelter."

Lassiter, his face color now back to its normal shade, rolls his eyes but, remarkably, then makes eye contact with the cat.

A) If Lassiter loves the cat, go to chapter 18 B) If Lassiter hates the cat, go to chapter 19 C) If Buzz walks in with Mauler, go to chapter 20 


	5. Chapter 5

"Nothing big, I just have to buy some egg nog at the grocery store."

"Really?" you ask. "You're nogless on Christmas Eve?"

Juliet chuckles despite herself. "Yes. It's a disgrace, I know. My brothers bring all the liquor - all I have to do is bring the egg nog, and I almost completely forgot."

"Wait a minute, wait just a minute," you twist slightly in your seat to face her better. "O'Hara family Christmases include heavily-liquored egg nog?"

"We wouldn't be Scottish if we didn't have real egg nog," she teases.

Oh man. As tempting as it is to invite yourself along to her Christmas gathering - or, more accurately, accepting her standing invitation from last year - something warns you that the combination of Juliet in her non-work clothes, meeting her family, and copious amounts of alcohol in your blood stream probably wouldn't be the best idea.

After a few moments of driving in companionable silence, Juliet pulls into a parking spot at Albertson's.

"I'll just be a minute."

A) If you offer to go inside with her, go to chapter 8 B) If you choose to stay in the car, go to chapter 9 


	6. Chapter 6

"Nothing big. I just have to deposit a check before the bank closes."

"Yeah. With the holiday hours, it can get tricky."

It takes no time at all to get to the bank, and although the line is fairly long, Juliet's in and out in no time.

It's barely been an hour when she pulls up to your apartment building.

"Well, thanks for the ride, Jules," you say, getting out of the car.

She shrugs and smiles. "It was no problem."

"Oh! Do you want me to go run upstairs and grab your present?"

Juliet glances at the clock. "Nah, that's okay. I'm late as it is. You can give it to me the next time I see you."

"Okay," you pat the roof of the car and lean down to the open window. "Merry Christmas, Jules!"

"Merry Christmas, Shawn!" she replies, rolling up the window before pulling back out into traffic. You stand on the lawn for a moment, watching her drive away, before you head inside.

THE END 


	7. Chapter 7

"Nothing big. I just have to-"

You look at the car's clock as she lists the innane tasks she has yet to accomplish before joining her family for their stupid Christmas Eve traditions.

You feel your blood racing. The rage doesn't happen often, and you can usually control it, but for whatever reason you don't want to.

"Shut up!" you yell angrily. Startled, Juliet jumps and turns to you. She can't tell if you're being serious. For a split second, you're not sure either.

It feels like you're at the edge of a precipice, and, for some reason, she's just pushed you off.

"I don't care what errands you have to run!" you snap, opening the car door. "You're an inconsiderate ass. Thanks for wasting my time!"

Marching off, you punch Gus's number into your cell. That wimpy little pain in the ass better answer.

You hear a muffled sob, but you don't bother to turn around. Even the sight of Lassiter slicing the paper off his car with his keys doesn't bring you any joy.

You go home and wallow in this new anger. You don't answer your dad's calls, you don't answer Gus's calls, and after a few television marathons Christmas is over.

You don't hear from the SBPD again. You and Gus keep Psych open for three months after your last case, but it's a money pit and Gus doesn't like your new mean streak anyway. He starts to avoid you, which is all too well because you hit the bottle pretty hard.

Eventually Gus and your father try to have an intervention, but it doesn't work. In fact, it only makes you angrier.

You storm off, get wasted at some hole in the wall, and go jump off a bridge.

Your bloated corpse washes to shore two days later. No one is surprised.

THE END

This chapter was really difficult to write. 


	8. Chapter 8

Juliet grabs her purse and opens the door.

"Nonsense. I'll come with you."

She pauses, her hand still on the door handle as she turns to you. "It's don't have to if you don't want."

"Jules, it's no biggie. In fact, egg nog sounded good, so I might grab some of my own. It'll make Christmas with my dad more bearable."

Juliet rolls her eyes as you join her on the walk inside. "I can't believe I never thought of liquor before," you add.

"I'm sure alcohol wouldn't solve anything, Shawn," she admonishes, grabbing a basket.

"You've obviously never spent time with my father."

Before you can get too far into a rant about Henry, you hear a noise behind you. As you turn, you see a giant display of holiday decorations tumbling in your direction.

You react instinctively, pushing Juliet out of the way, but you're not fast enough to save yourself. The tower of boxes of mistletoe, candy cane and artificial Christmas trees crashes down on you.

The world goes silent as you're crushed to a festive death.

For some reason, your thoughts drift to Christmas 1992 when your dad asked you for help with the decorations, and you refused, and he said, "Come on, they're Christmas decorations. It's not like they're going to kill you."

Ha! Henry didn't know everything.

THE END 


	9. Chapter 9

"Don't forget to leave the keys. I could freeze to death out here."

"Shawn, it's 58 degrees."

"Jules, I'm like a lizard. I can't survive cold weather."

"Are you really going to use all my gas to run the heater when it's not cold out?"

"Okay, okay. Fine. I really wanted to listen to the radio."

Juliet rolls her eyes and hands you the keys.

After five minutes of flipping through the radio - nothing on, mostly commercials, no wonder it's a dying medium - you get out, walk over to the driver's side, and lift the handle.

A) If you drive up to the entrace to wait for Jules, go to chapter 10 B) If the door is locked, go to chapter 11 


	10. Chapter 10

Jules is grateful.

She invites you to her family Christmas.

You meet and mingle with the O'Haras, charming the women and earning the respect of the guys.

As the night wears on, and the children go to sleep, the adults start a drinking game with egg nog shots while watching "It's a Wonderful Life." You all get pretty hammered. No one can drive you home.

You offer to call your dad, but Juliet says you shouldn't ruin his Christmas and says you can stay over. You follow her upstairs to get blankets and pillows for the couch, since the spare room and air mattress are occupied.

She decides you need pajamas and you sit on the bed, the world spinning slightly, as she looks through her drawers.

Giggling, she pulls out a fuzzy red adult onesie that her great-grandma had made for her. It is too big, and also a onesie, but she didn't have the heart to tell her. She thinks it'll fit you.

To humor her, you go in her bathroom (resisting the urge to look through her cabinets) and try it on. You come back in the room and Juliet laughs so hard that you laugh.

Slowly, the laughter fades and, amazingly, she leans in to kiss you.

You enjoy the kiss - oh, how you enjoy the kiss - but you back away. It takes every reserve of restraint.

You don't want her to regret anything.

Juliet smiles coyly. "Then don't give me anything to regret."

And with that you wake up Christmas morning in bed next to Juliet, the onesie in a pile on the floor.

THE END 


	11. Chapter 11

You have that sickening feeling in your stomach as you pull on the handle.

It's locked.

You rush back to the passenger side.

It's locked, too.

Just then, you look up to see Juliet walking towards you, a large bag in one hand and a puzzled look on her face.

"What are you doing out here? I thought you were cold."

You grin sheepishly. "I was going to drive up to meet you at the entrance, but the door was locked."

"What?!" Juliet puts the bag on the hood and holds her hand up to the window. Sure enough, the keys are dangling from the ignition.

"Shawn!"

"I'm sorry!" you defend, rubbing the back of your neck nervously. "I didn't mean to."

"Did you call anyone?"

You point to your cell phone, sitting on the car seat.

Juliet gives a half-grunt, half-growl - very Lassiter-like, actually - and pulls out her cell phone.

Lassiter doesn't answer.

"Try Gus," you suggest.

Gus doesn't answer.

Sighing, you read her your father's number.

For all your grumblings about Henry, he's the one who answers and pulls up in the truck twenty one minutes later.

By then, Juliet's cracked open one of the egg nogs; she's not letting you have any.

You let Juliet into the truck first.

"Thank you so much, Mr. Spencer," she says, buckling her seat belt. "I have a spare set at the station."

"It's not a big deal, Detective. It happens to everybody."

"Yes, it does," Juliet gives you a pointed look.

You zone out for a second and when you're paying attention again, they're discussing Christmas plans. It's almost as if you're not even sitting in the car.

By the time you arrive at the station, Juliet is good naturedly defending her family's tradition of opening presents on Christmas Eve.

Henry pulls into a parking spot and the car falls silent.

"Aren't you getting out?" Henry asks you.

"What? Me?"

"Yeah. You were the one who locked the keys in the car, right?"

"Yes. On accident!" you defend.

"They're in my top left desk drawer, under the legal pad."

Your father and Juliet are giving you identical stares - it's really creeping you out.

Sighing heavily, you trudge out of the car and up the stairs.

The station is practically empty.

The keys aren't where she said.

You check, double check, and triple check, but no keys. You lift the legal pad, flipping through the pages as if keys could magically be hiding in them.

You start sifting through the rest of the drawer when a throat clears behind you.

"Can I help you, Mr. Spencer?" Chief Vick asks, a slight smile on her face. She's wearing her coat and obviously on her way home.

"This isn't what it looks like," you say automatically. Before you can get another word out, Juliet rounds the corner.

"Sorry, Shawn!" she calls, striding across the station. "I forgot I moved them to the other drawer."

The Chief looks surprised as Juliet obliviously opens another drawer and retrieves the keys.

"Come on," Juliet urges, heading back outside. "I want to go home."

The Chief gives you a look, part amused and part warning. You can't help but grin at her assumption.

"Merry Christmas, Chief."

"Merry Christmas, Mr. Spencer."

THE END 


	12. Chapter 12

Unfortunately, Lassiter's CPR certification is due at the end of the month and he hasn't bothered yet with the update class.

Lassiter rushes to your side. For all his huffing and puffing, he looks awfully pale and morose while assessing your wounds. You, of course, can't see any of this, but your aura is very in tune with the tangible world and is keeping you updated.

Lassiter rubs his forehead, forcing himself to remember.

He ticks off the steps on his fingers. "Evaluate the situation. Ask if the victim is okay."

He pauses, looking down at your mangled torso. "Hey, Spencer," his voice is surprisingly soft for a man that was, only moments earlier, actively contemplating shooting you. "Are you okay? Are you okay? Can you hear me?"

Obviously, you're not okay. And you can't hear him. But Lassie's always been a stickler for the rules.

"Crap," his voice is back to normal. "What the hell's the next step?"

He looks up towards Juliet's car. She's still sitting, frozen, in the front seat, a horrified expression etched on her face.

"O'Hara!" he calls. "What's the step after asking if they're okay"

It only takes Lassiter thirty eight more seconds to remember, but you've already been dead for a minute and fifteen seconds so it's not of much use to you.

If it's any consolation, though, Gus is forever haunted by the fact that "Enjoy your funeral!" were the last words he said to you.

THE END


	13. Chapter 13

Lassiter presses and holds down 2 for his speed dial, though it takes just about as long as hitting 9-1-1 and the call button would.

Juliet manages to thaw from her shock only slightly. She puts the car in park and runs out, sobbing at the sight of your body. She falls to her feet, and, even though she knows she shouldn't, gently nudges your shoulder.

"Shawn," her voice cracks, the tears not far away. "Wake up. Please, wake up."

It's not exactly how you'd want it to be, but she is next to you asking you to wake up. Sadly, you're not in bed together but rather in the middle of the street. Were you concious, your mind would have made a joke about that Beatles' song - 'Why Don't We Do It in the Road?' - but since you're not, your quip is lost to the ages.

"The ambulance is on the way," Lassiter states matter-of-factly, trying to keep the emotion - dear God! emotions! - in check.

Juliet's hand slips from your nonreactive shoulder to check your pulse. "He's still breathing."

The ambulance is here before you know it - well, you wouldn't know it anyway, what with being unconscious - and you're loaded up in back. Juliet insists on riding along, and no one dares to refuse her.

The doctors work quickly and manage to save your life. They induce a coma to alleviate some of the pressure on your brain.

A) If you wake up in a day, go to chapter 15 B) If you wake up in a week, go to chapter 16 C) If you wake up in ten years, two months, thirteen days, three hours, and five minutes, go to chapter 17


	14. Chapter 14

Luckily, you're dead by the time Lassiter digs the grave in the far back corner of his yard. It's well hidden by some overgrowth and shrubs, and no one finds you.

Sure, Gus and your father look for a long time.

But Lassiter's good. He hides your bike, suggests that you must have taken off. In the investigation into your disappearance, Henry ends up becoming Gus's new partner. Psych is kept open. For the first year, they mostly just follow leads on your whereabouts. After that, slowly, almost reluctantly, they start to take on actual cases.

Their relationship with the SBPD is never the same though. Although Gus only has conspiracy theories, he can't help but feel like Lassie was involved.

Juliet's shock worsens and never really comes out of it. Eventually, she fails her psych evaluation but manages not to reveal her secret. A shell of her former self, she ends up in a mental institution.

Your final resting place is never discovered, but at least Lassiter keeps a very nice yard.

THE END 


	15. Chapter 15

You only briefly gain consciousness.

It's enough to see blurs of outlines of visitors at your bedside. It's also enough to feel a wave of pain unlike anything you've felt in your life.

Sparing all the medical jargon, basically, you woke up too early from your coma. Your brain and your body can't cope.

Juliet pleads guilty to involuntary manslaughter. Gus tries to keep Psych alive but it doesn't last long. Henry becomes even grumpier.

And dozens and dozens of crimes go unsolved and innocent people are framed all because you aren't there to help.

Makes you wish you'd stayed in that coma a little longer, huh?

THE END 


	16. Chapter 16

The first face you see hovering over your bed rail is not Juliet's but, alas, that of your father.

The only thought that pops into your brain is, "Man, he needs to shave."

You try to tell him that, but your throat is dry so it doesn't work. Also there's a tube in your mouth.

You start choking. This catches everyone's attention, and soon someone rushes to your side while another gets a medical professional.

It takes a while to heal, and even years later your joints will ache when it rains, but you do make a full recovery.

Using Juliet's immense guilt for your own gain, you manage to score a date with her.

In just over a year, you're married.

You have three children, and you delight in telling them as often as possible the story of how their mother ran over their father.

Juliet really wishes you would stop telling that story.

Honestly. It's been a long time. You should probably let it go.

THE END 


	17. Chapter 17

It's ten years before you awake.

Ten years, two months, thirteen days, three hours, and five minutes.

In other words, practically a lifetime.

It takes a long time to adjust. After your months of physical therapy, you still have a lot of changes to get used to.

Gus is married and has not one, not two, but four children. He's been busy. You can't help but feel (for a moment, at least) that maybe you'd been holding him back. He'd known you for two decades and just look what he'd accomplished in one on his own.

Chief Vick retired. Lassiter, unsurprisingly, is now the Chief. He's also - incredibly surprisingly - happily remarried and father to two little girls.

Your dad is older, weaker, balder. He had a heart attack six years ago, but is still kicking. The nurses tell you that he visited you every single day. That he never gave up hope. Also he scared away seventeen different nurses.

Juliet, oh, sweet Juliet looks the same. A few more lines, and bags under her eyes, but her slouching stance automatically corrects when she sees you're awake. Her eyes have that twinkle that you've been told had been missing for ten years.

She never married, though she had been close. But her fiance couldn't understand why she, like Henry, needed to see you every day.

Since their visiting hours often overlapped, your father and Juliet seem to be best buds now. That is perhaps the weirdest thing to get used to.

That, and Britney Spears being a politician.

THE END 


	18. Chapter 18

Lassiter's hardened eyes soften slightly.

You strain your ears and you can almost hear his heart growing three sizes that day.

Lassie tries to save face by snapping loudly for you to get the fleabag out of the buliding. But he turns and quietly asks you to hold onto him - "Damn it, Spencer, her!" - until his shift is over.

What a perfect Christmas gift.

You pat yourself on the back (metaphorically). It's a job nicely done.

You figure now's not the time to tell Lassie the cat's not litter box trained. 


	19. Chapter 19

The cat growls almost as loud as Lassiter does.

"I hate it. Go kill it."

The cat hisses and you can't blame him.

Usually, you can read people pretty well, but Lassiter really surprised you. But you're a man of your word (most of the time), and so you bend down and put the agitated feline back in the box.

"Fine, I'll take him to the shelter," you say heavily. You lift the box and give Lassiter one last chance to change his mind.

"Get out of here already," he barks, not even looking up.

Your feet and your soul are heavy, but you trudge nevertheless to the front of the station.

A) If Juliet runs after you, go to chapter 21 B) If you go to the shelter, go to chapter 22 


	20. Chapter 20

You're still dangling the cat in front of Lassiter when Buzz walks into the precinct with Mauler.

You've watched cartoons like this your entire life, plus you're "psychic," so you know exactly what's going to happen before it happens.

Almost exactly.

The cat sees the dog, the dog sees the cat. Barking, scratching, faces bleeding, hissing, running, chasing, chairs upturned, papers everywhere.

Chaos.

Christmas chaos.

The cat escapes into the holding cell.

Mauler is lead away.

And the officers turn to treat the wounds.

Definitely, definitely going with a non-living gift next year. 


	21. Chapter 21

"Shawn!" Juliet calls out, jogging across the lot to you.

You're grinning by the time she arrives.

Good old Jules.

Her heart is too big.

Just like yours.

"You weren't really going to take him to his death, were you?" she asks, slightly out of breath.

"I'm a man of my word, Jules," you say, even though you really aren't. You mean to be, but there are so many exceptions.

"I can take him home," Juliet declares, reaching out to pet the cat. "Her, I mean."

"Pfft. This is a boy cat, Jules."

Juliet rolls her eyes, taking the box from you. "She's a calico, Shawn. Calicos are always girls."

You pout.

"Are you pouting?"

"No."

You totally are.

"What's wrong with girl cats?"

You shrug, following Jules as she walks to her car. "Nothing, really."

"Good. Because I think I have the perfect name for her."

"Really?"

"Yes. Shawna."

You smile.

"Thanks, Jules."

You pick the cat up as she unlocks her car. You feel a sense of warmth flow through your entire body.

"You're welcome," Jules replies, taking the cat from you and frowning slightly. "I think Shawna just peed all over you."

THE END 


	22. Chapter 22

You're man enough to admit that you cry like a little girl the whole way home from the shelter.

It really puts a damper on the holidays.

You spend a lot of time moping through the holidays. That poor little innocent cat didn't deserve such shoddy treatment from society. First he - okay, she - gets kicked out of your apartment, then she gets rejected by a possible foster father, and finally she's put to sleep because there are too many other rejected cats.

You feel horrible, and there's nothing you can do about it short of buying a home large enough for the entire kennel.

After a mellow and depressing Christmas, you make your New Year's resolutions. First on the list is a vow to give Lassiter a harder time in 2009.

THE END 


End file.
